Veneration | Day in the life RCD

Hello RCD readers,

Today I write with an in between heart and mindset. You see last weekend I choose something that was a little bit expensive for me. Because it wasn't planned. But it was necessary. I did a masterclass about " fire-safe construction". I saw the flyer weeks ago from an old teacher/freelance boss. And I couldn't decide if I should do it. A lot was making me really nervous. The amount of money. The idea will I be able to follow (just my own insecurity). Would it be the money worth while or not. I think last course I followed physical was when I still was with my partner during Covid early years about taxes. It was so informative and I still remember that day. Everything. I lost the information and when I needed the information for my own taxes a lot had changed. I was not a sole proprietorship but a limited company. So my taxes was really different.

I'm getting off track. The course was really informative. I have a lot more to learn and it was almost 5 hours with a couple of 15min breaks. Nobody knew me. I wasn't really social. And as I tried to connect with just the ones besides me. They were cold and distant. So I just focused on the course itself. The teachers were very kind. Mostly because I was one of the few they had no idea who I was. It was definitely the money worth while after all.

Masked Temptation

I was so tired but still put my big girls panties on to go support my ballerina's at night. I almost stayed home but remembered that when I danced I would've loved if friends and family would've come to support. So I came to watch them dance. I didn't stay the whole night. I was seeing mist everywhere cause my eyes were falling asleep. Which wasn't that smart of me to do and very dangerous.

Now for the name.

I have a lot of admiration for people. Some strangers. Some close friends. But just the women around me. Even those I met after years during the weekend which we aren't that close anymore I really admire and always will. But I would love to talk about a couple of young ladies. Emphasis on a couple. Because if you look long enough you can see the magic and gift of God in anybody. Once you just ask

Sweet J

One I have become really close with because she made me feel safe and lifted me up when I was really down. We just clicked again after years like we didn't hit a beat. Her motivation to her growth is an inspiration and not even 30 yet. So proud of her. 

The Dance mom

She had a lot of hits over the years. But she changed the game when it came to recreating what others in Suriname dance community couldn't by finding a bond still as fellow dance teachers. It's admiring to see these women break the cycle of judging each other's and seeing each other's as competitors but seeing each others as fellow colleagues. I told her awhile ago to be really proud of herself. She did a lot even if she doesn't see it sometimes.

Admiration for a stranger

The third one is somebody who I have to be honest I just admire a lot. She does so much. And is a busy bee with her "Books by Clarissa", "Write4You Consultancy-Suriname" and last "PCOS Awareness Suriname". She is making an impact in Suriname and making her own way. It's amazing to watch sometimes. I really hope everything goes smooth for her and she achieve her goals.

Proud of myself

I was a proud girl this weekend. I did something out of my comfort zone. I did something that I wanted but made sure that I didn't step over my own boundary to just please others. I've healed in some ways and reacted very differently than I would years ago. And last I gave someone grace by just being polite when she was everything but that to me years ago. It felt like full circle. This rift is over and gone. No reconnecting but feels good to just be cordial. But most important I made sure to show the people I care about them without people pleasing and losing myself. 

Have a blessed day. Make sure to tell the people around you those simple words;

"thank you", "I'm proud of you", "I admire you", "I'll support you" and most important "love you". Let people be who they are. Accept them as they are and don't let that effect who you are in the core. Be true to yourself. Don't loose yourself. Always honor yourself but most important be honest and authentic.