Goodbye 34 | Day in the life RCD

Let go and let flow. Don't hold on to anything that needs to leave your life. Allow people to let you go with grace and no inner hate.

Hello RCD readers,

Today is my owru jari. Last day of being 34. My day started with God answering a prayer these two weeks of people in my life that are not from God. Which might sounds weird but I don't beg anybody to be in my life. I slowly let people leave who want to go. It sounds weird but I have given people chances in life consistently. I have given them the benefit of the doubt every time to see if the person actually is a honesf good hearted friend. And I've noticed many were for own gain but the moment you don't let people misuse your kindness they magically disappear and loose interest. 

Now from old friends to new. I stopped trying to take this personally.  It is hurting me trusting new people in general and JUST staying close with my support system. This experience is something I feared. Not being able to open to new people and staying in the bubble. Being so hurt by people that new people need to prove to you that they actually care about your wellbeing. I actually want to stay open to new people in my life. And it feels like a loosing battle. But I've stop following the norm. Being mean and cold towards your "frenemies". My kindness towards these people will not change. I don't think any of them will even try to stay connected once they figured out that I stopped putting an effort into the friendship.  But I don't put the effort anymore like I use too. Meaning overly try to make friendships work. They explode in your face. Just go with the flow.. Because the people I met 2 years ago are still the go to call for everything in my life. They got me😎

You see when you pray for God to always reveal who actually is from him in this season of your life. It gets really lonely because you get hurt from friends that where so close being all the sudden so distant.  And your inner circle / support system stays small. People that I really can trust in life are a phone call away. 

But I've learned this little small group does more for me mentally, physically and spiritually than  any of these new and old friendships ever did.

They support you by giving a keychain with your name when you had rough month.

They give you a ring on your first Valentine day single again.

They do your make up when you haven't spoken to them for years.

They help you out no matter how many times you pushed them away.

They feed you and calm you down late at night without asking.

They help your spirational journey with God. They support your career in so many ways. 

They speak life into my soul.

They nurture you back to health.

They keep you sane with laughter.

They show you real love and support.

They call you out on your bullshit.

They push you to keep moving and not give up.

They keep your secrets.

I'm thankful for these people in my life. Not sure if they are here for a season or for a lifetime. But I know they are God's gifts from heaven. I can't be more loved and grateful. 

So with this new chapter in life. And God letting me go through these rough couple years not alone is a blessing. He knew the people around me were not able to help me carry this load so he shed them off that season so I could be able to withstand this season.  So I thank those people who were their for me that part of my life. Even if they showed their true colours this season. They meant a lot back then. And we supported each other back then because God put us together to help each other in that season of our life.

So I'll hope you stay forever. But if not you mean the world to me now. Love you guys.