Your Body | Day in the life RCD

Hello RCD readers,

This is a blog post I've been waiting to write for so long. 

How did this subject came to be?

During dance class we as women had a discussing as we always do about our weight. The teacher talked about her lack off and jokingly said to the thicker ladies give me some. So the conversation went to. "I want more boobs. I want my sisters hips and butt. I want to feel stronger with my body. I want to loose more weight. And so ".

As we discussed everything wrong with our body.  It made my silent ass think at home.

I've had periods' of my life during my relationships wishing I had my small full boobs and thighs back when I was just turning 16. So I could actually feel like they were dating a woman and not a girl. Or that I wished my hair was longer and thicker because I had some asshole continuously complaining about my thin hair plus short hair. No matter how long it grew they never saw that. Always making a comment about the length. Or comments how it had to be natural. Those slick comments how I would love to see your natural curls. Or those endless remarks of my teeth and dry lips. Later the remarks of skinny arms and collarbone showing. Oow and those lovely comments of not having a butt which I have to say I found cute.

Now this is not a bashing people blog post. It's about loving yourself. 

You see every single thing a person said to me. I never spoke up because I believed it first. I had insecurity about it first. Except the teeth. I actually was very suborn about everyone's comments that I still get to this day. 

What do I want people to learn from this blog post?

Love your body. Love each and every imperfection about this. These make you different and special. And God has this special way of showing you why your most hated imperfection can become your blessings. 

It's not a female sex problem

I've met men who hate their teeth and use to smile a certain way just because they hated it. I've met men hated their body weight and made them insecure. I've met men who hated that they were balding or getting grey at a young age. I've met men who over exercise just because they hate their body in any other way if it's not bulk up and looks fit.

What is my imperfection these days?

The biggest is my body weight is to low for my liking. 

Body every single phase

I've embraced this. It's not healthy but I've embraced it because I'm not going to hate on my body in any form or size. Which means these stressful years where I've been on survival mode for so long. This to thin body gave me the daily strength I need. To power through when I push myself a little to get personal and professional stuff done. It's been strong enough to carry the load that I stopped waiting for people to care until somebody carries the load again. I've also embraced it and I've been kind towards my body because I know this will pass. I will not be on survival mode always. I will not be this thin always. I'm not rushing anything. But I am making sure I get my healthy apatite again and enjoy cooking plus eating like I use too. It does not help to critique your body in any form. Even the unhealthy phase. Just do your best to take care of yourself and be kind towards these changes. 

Here are some tips for improving your body image:

https://caps.unc.edu/self-help/10-ways-to-love-your-body/

1. Listen to your body. Eat when you are hungry and rest when you are tired.
2. Change the messages you are giving yourself. Identify the negative ways that you speak to yourself and make a decision to replace that self-talk with more realistic, loving, and positive statements.
3. Throw out the bathroom scale. You are much more than a number on a scale. Instead focus on the most important things about yourself like your unique talents, qualities, skills, and characteristics.
4. Think of your body as an instrument instead of as an ornament. Be thankful every day for all of the wonderful things you can do in your body such as dance, play, run, enjoy good food, and give hugs!
5. Exercise to feel good and be healthy, not to lose weight or punish your body. Find fun ways to add more physical activity in your life, such as going for a walk with a friend.*think about being healthy and not thin or thick. Because thin people eat and exercise to gain. And get their dream body. Remember to do this to feel strong and healthy. Because thin or ripped are not guaranteed to make you feel healthy in your skin.
6. Move with your head held high. If you act like someone with a healthy body image and good self-confidence, the “act” will eventually become reality.
7. Wear comfortable clothes that fit. Clothes that are too large or too small tend to create physical discomfort and may make you feel even worse about your body. Clothes that fit you well are designed to complement your figure. Remember that you are so much more than the size you wear.
8. Question ads that perpetuate unrealistic standards for our bodies. Instead of saying, "What’s wrong with me," say, "What’s wrong with this ad?" Write the company. Set your own standards instead of letting the media set them for you.
9. Surround yourself with people who are supportive of you and your body, not critical. *I just zone out to people who have bad comments
10. Use strategies to love yourself. Make a list of what you like about yourself that have nothing to do with your body. Make a list of things you like about your body - your eyes, for example, or hair. Remind yourself of these lists regularly. *I try to take care of my mental health first and the rest comes easily because if you feel better mentally you'll start loving yourself better and taking more care of yourself

“Loving your body is about being comfortable in your body, and only you get to set the parameters of that. Only you get to decide what that looks like, and only you know where the finish line is. Never let anyone make you feel ashamed about what you decide, or don't decide, to put on your body.” — Brittany Gibbons